We are promised a big patch in August this year, with graphics upgrades, improved matchmaking and tier X light tanks, among others. But why, oh why, can't our lady tankers sound like lady tankers please Wargaming?
With international Women's Day just past, we were camping our usual bush on Lakeville when the thought struck us again: why don't my female crew sound like women?
Now, we know this is hardly a radical thought - it's been an issue since the introduction of female crews. Some mod packs have tried to address it, with varying degrees of success - but they are no replacement for a properly baked-in voice solution from WG.
I mean, apart from the ones many of us earned during the introduction of the Swedish tech tree, it's a reasonable grind to get our lady tankers - so why can't we have them as they should be? The real immersion any of us get from our crews doesn't come from the visual representation of them in the game - it comes from what our commander tells us during a match.
"We just dinged them" has broken many a WoT heart - so at least let it be done by my alluring French FCM 50T female commander, in French. I might even enjoy it a bit more then. A bit.
Let's do some maths - we know Wargaming is all about the $$$, and that's fine, it's a business. However, we're sure that for a small-ish outlay of kopeks, they could introduce a full choir of international female voices and bring joy to us all.
There are nine nations represented in the game. And at most, there are less than 200 separate commander responses covering everything from getting hit in the sights to causing splash damage.
Let's be generous, and say, given multiple attempts at giving the phrases the right feel, each nation would take three days of recording and consequently three days of voice actor time. You're going to need good recording facilities and a sound engineer or two as well. So let's say £2,000 a day.
That's £54,000. Round it up for travel and expenses, £60,000. Add in some developer time - let's say £5,000 worth. Total: £65,000.
It's not much for that little bit of extra care that makes any game go from good to great.
Of course, there's a few male WoT players who probably don't want female voices in the game - those with wives than already give them a hard time.